Seriously, this crap is out of control. My inbox is stuffed with messages for useless products. How am I supposed to filter all this garbage? It's pushing me over the edge.

• I just want get a actual email for once.
• Perhaps in another lifetime this will end.
• {Until then|{Until that day arrives|I'm resigned to deleting spam all day long.

Junk Mail: The Virtual Filth Bombarding Me

My inbox feels like a click here garbage dump/is overflowing with/is choked by spam. It's like someone is dumping/as if an automated bot is relentlessly pouring/throwing/sending digital poop into my virtual mailbox every day. Every time I try to get some work done/check for legitimate emails/enjoy a moment of peace, there it is: another {outrageous offer/unbelievable deal/suspicious message from some random company/person/scheme. It's enough to make me want to throw my computer out the window/delete my email account/scream into the void.

• I swear I didn't sign up for/How did they even get my email address?/Who gave them permission to bombard me with this junk?
• There are so many variations/It's always different/They use every trick in the book!
• Maybe one day I'll find a way to stop it/Someday they'll catch those spammers/Perhaps there's a magic spell for this problem.

I'm So Sick Of Your Fucking Spam Emails

Seriously, too much is simply ridiculous. Every day I get flooded with your pointless offers for things I don't even care about. I've attempted to unsubscribe, but it's like talking to a brick wall. At this point, I'm just mad as hell.

• This has gone too far.
• Learn some respect for people's time.
• Consider this my final warning.

Make This Spam Stop You Assholes

Listen up, you bunch of idiots. This spam/junk mail/crap needs to get the hell out here. I'm sick with your garbage to scam/con/trick me.

You think you're so clever sending me this useless/pointless/worthless junk, but you're just a bunch of losers. I'm going to report/block/slander every single one of your emails/messages/schemes. So consider yourself warned.

• Get lost
• This is useless to me

Enough is Enough, You Spamming Bastards!

Listen up, you sleazeballs! Your spammy emails are clogging up inboxes and pissed off people. We've had enough of your garbage. This is your final warning to quit this. Keep sending that rubbish, and we'll be forced to take legal action. Understand? You better believe it.

Drop Dead With Your Annoying Emails

You know you're so clever, sending out your junk to every random person you can find. But guess what, moron? I give a damn for your deception. Get a real job or kill yourself already.

• Seriously With Your Spammy Messages
• I have no time
• Get a real job or kill yourself already.